My Wrestling Confession

Yes, I do have a wrestling confession to make is it may surprise many of you loyal readers on here. I’m not entirely sure what you could be thinking so I’ll tag you in. 😉🤔You probably have heard me say countless of times that I don’t watch any wrestling anymore and haven’t regularly since the Ultimate Warrior disappeared from my TV in Nov. of 1992. That pretty much has remained the same despite some little moments here and there. You all can possibly guess what those were all about. I have watched RAW more lately. There, I said it. The big reveal! The whole 3 hours? No. SmackDown or NXT? Not so much but again, some content on occasion. AEW Dynamite isn’t on my list either although Sting being there is awesome! My bro loves Chris Jericho.

Once in a while, I will be interested in a certain match and might catch a few minutes. I know for most wrestling fans, 3 hours brings so much entertainment and excitement but it seems very loooong to me. Once you get into a storyline or character, I’m sure the time flies but personally that’s even longer than watching a movie! I heard “The Batman” movie is that long but in a theater, I would need more cushion support to sit! 😜 I gotta give you WWE fans (or any other organization) credit for watching all that you do.

I guess after all, I have more to confess. Once WrestleMania XXXVIII ended, I knew videos would be posted. Yes, I looked up all the results but of course some matches intrigued me more than others. Boy, did they top themselves on this one! *** SPOILER ALERT HERE*** I also had to see The Undertaker get inducted. Despite my earlier posts of years past, that character has had an incredible run as the Phenom, Deadman, and of course Taker among other names. Thank you Mark for gifting WWE with over 30 years in the business. How about his hug with Vince? Too sweet… The Ultimate Warrior’s name should’ve been listed at the top since he was Taker’s first big name opponent, just sayin’! Never say never from him. We’ll see what happens... 😬🪦⚱️⚰️

Speaking of Vince, his win in the ring was a first at a WM and then the encounter with “Stone Cold” Steve Austin making a return. Legendary, just legendary. The Stunner wins again! Hard to believe WM runs two nights but with all those divisions, guess that’s a must. Everyone was talking about Cody Rhodes as well and we can’t ever forget all the amazing women Superstars. I’d stay out of Bianca’s way with all that hair, yikes! Oh, I’ve always loved Roman Reigns too. Oops, I never liked “heels” back in the day but he didn’t start out that way. Another confession.

Who is this girl going on and on about WWE? Clearly, she isn’t me but maybe this time, she came out to play a little. Does anyone old enough remember the other WWF shows back in the day? We had Superstars on Saturday A.M. at 11, Challenge on Sunday A.M., and then later on Primetime Friday at 10 P.M. I think– at least where I lived anyways. Let’s not forget SNME, The Main Event, and back when they only had a few PPV’s each year. There was just The Royal Rumble, WrestleMania, SummerSlam, and The Survivor Series. I do recall In Your House and King of the Ring but look at all the many more they do now. RAW used to compete with WCW’s NITRO and I remember WCW being on Saturdays after WWF at noon on a different channel. So, one could watch both if you wanted those two hours. Yep, just an hour each.

I added up some math here and get this. All 3 WWF (later WWE) shows at an hour a piece equates all 3 hours of RAW now. Crazy, isn’t it? You can watch 7 hours of WWE entertainment each week plus catching up with Peacock or even their Wrestling Network. SmackDown and NXT equally 2 hours each. I bet most of your fans do ALL that but in pure honesty, it’ll never be me.

Back in my day, an hour actually was enough— emotionally speaking! Unless I was watching SNME which took Saturday Night Live’s time slot being 1.5 hours. I’m not a night owl so staying up until 1 A.M. was always like a submission hold but I’d never tap out! Sometimes, I’d be babysitting until 2 A.M. and couldn’t keep my eyes open. 😳😴 There were those times like I’ve said before where that hour show became “continued” in a way with a match starting 5 minutes or so before the end! We were just left hanging until next week.

I believe I’m all done getting caught up lately but still know this. With social media these days, I know what’s going on and with always having my big Bro to let me know “important” stuff, I’m in the wrestling loop. You’ll not catch me watching one of their entire shows but if my WMVI DVD wasn’t skipping over parts, I would watch ALL of that and not just the Ultimate Challenge! That’s what I get for buying a used DVD, ugh… My old school girl self is always there or these warrior writings wouldn’t exist. She has evolved though and appreciates it all. Just think, Vince will be close to 80 when WrestleMania XXXX comes around! That’s only two years away– wow!

P.S. (Of last week…) I forgot my OWN number 8 connector this year. I got my Warrior logo tattoo on my daughter’s 8th birthday. She’ll be 16 soon...

P.P.S. So glad the crowd also acknowledged Triple H! He is an outstanding guy (:

www.spiritandbelief.com

*** Find me here for book info on how Warrior’s energy got my intuition stronger with signs! It involves dreams, meditation, psychic traits, and MORE! *** I thank everyone for their support. You can follow me as well over at Twitter, YouTube, and a U.W. fb group. 📗⚡️🙋🏻‍♀️💪🏻✍🏻💙🙏🏻

Oh, That Deja Vu… ☯️❤️‍🩹

We all have those moments of deja vu in our lives without truly realizing it but then again, there are those times that we do. Warrior’s final appearance on Monday night RAW April 7, 2014 brought some deja vu, at least to me anyway. A little of what he said echoed his past appearance of 18 years prior in 1996. That exact date was April 8th, (sigh) close enough to 2014’s. He also referenced the audiences with the word of “YOU” several times being voices that wouldn’t die becoming storytellers and legends. A 3.5 year absence doesn’t compare to 18 but a little deja vu, oh yeah.

I would often think of that word in regards to Warrior’s comings and goings. After an absence and a return, would it be like deja vu all over again? Would those same “difficulties” possibly surface regarding money, contracts, appearances, or any of that? Those weren’t always prevalent but some can say deja vu if issues repeat themselves. I, of course wished none of that stuff became like deja vu but every time was different.

Another reminder that is more recent involves the untimely passing of Bob Saget. It pains me to even type this as I still can’t believe he is gone. Deja vu hit my phone when I found out that news. I had gotten two text messages. One from my brother and one from my youngest sister. I loved the show “Full House” but mostly because of John Stamos. He was another of those celebs when I wrote “The Rebel Warrior.” The show was adorable but Bob was really incredibly loved by all. Those same two siblings also had me in a group text almost 8 years ago informing me of Warrior’s passing. That was another post but connects here.

They engaged in that for quite a while when I finally responded saying how I couldn’t respond but got all the messages. Those texts were so detailed like they were consoling me in such an intimate way. It was endearing but I got so defensive because of all the emotions. They knew it would hit me unbelievably hard and were checking up on my well-being. The texts about Bob were brief but I immediately thought of deja vu as it seemed to repeat again only less personal. Neither had ever texted me so close together about another celebrity death.

Whew, moving on… My home now has some deja vu with my childhood home. Both are older, both have big backyards, both had grapevines, both were places with pools, and probably so much more. When I moved here, yep- deja vu struck again. We can have life imitating art or vice versa. Even dreams will maybe send us that deja vu as we go about our lives thinking we’ve done this before, been here already, or something similar. Dreams can go even deeper for some in their past but it’s all a belief system. I know a few that have very strong connections to a certain way of life involving a culture or even a specific place. Past lives are part of a belief but that certain kind of deja vu hasn’t happened to me. It still may though, who knows? 🤷🏻‍♀️

Sometimes we repeat an idea or activity because we like it and it feels right. Other times though, we repeat it because subconsciously, it works in our life whether we realize it or not. I know that sounds crazy but I’ll use some easy examples. Let’s look at wrestling since, I dunno- just because! Vince made Hulk Hogan the WWF champion over and over again back in the day. So many reasons factored in like popularity, money, the character worked, and others. I realize this technically isn’t deja vu but hear me out. That is a business and is scripted unlike our lives but it’s a literal example of something repeating. 

How about our lives? We repeat what works for our own reasons but on a deeper level, there’s more. It’s familiar and comfortable because it’s part of us. I like to write when I was younger but no idea déjà vu would be an issue 10 years later. Most that do a fitness routine may become robotic over time and yes, that happens with me too. Warrior probably would switch his repetitive routine sometimes as well. We want to stay fit. Those things are routine but your true passions will affect you differently.

A passion can become dormant for a while and then resurface when you thought it was done in your life. I’m sure you can think of examples of your past kind of repeating in a new or unexpected way. Warrior’s return to the WWE in 2014 brought about much déjà vu for him I’m sure as he remembered many memories -great, good, and bad. Just think of another NOLA appearance he made in 1984 with bodybuilding and then 30 years later for WMXXX weekend. I’ve mentioned that before but déjà vu playing out again.

I think with most déjà vu moments, they are more subtle than direct. We know our every day stuff or routines but think of those times that perhaps aren’t as obvious. You might not know why something resonates with you at that moment, but it just does for whatever reason. It may just connect to a recent past memory but maybe the déjà vu goes way back. It can get tricky though as we do repeat activities for a lifestyle but there might be more to it than that.

Whether one believes in déjà vu as part of them or not, it does exist as we sometimes just gloss over all those moments in time. We say: “been there, done that” often but deja vu sneaks up on us when we aren’t expecting it. Sure, it can also come about as planned like big stuff typically does but the little things should get attention too. I have written many stories about little thoughts that matter just as much as the big ones. Many did involve déjà vu but not always in the way one might think.

Look at your life for those déjà vu moments and accept them as part of you. It doesn’t have to be super deep all the time and quite often, isn’t. You may not have a repeat return, a backyard memory, or a text message but déjà vu is there. Our past does come back in doses to remind us to stop and think of two little words called déjà vu and what it truly means in life. If it repeats, look to the real reason why. I can agree with this most ultimately! 💙🙋🏻‍♀️🥰

P.S. When some of my spiritual gifts developed more, it seemed to fit so naturally like I wasn’t just learning it all for the first time. Déjà vu indeed for you deep soul thinkers!

www.spiritandbelief.com

*** Find me here for a more in depth spiritual blog PLUS book info on the guy who started it all. It’s available on Amazon and other outlets. I share personal short stories on my past with wrestling, psychic traits, humor, family stuff, and more! Thank you for the support.

*** I am also on Twitter and YouTube where I discuss spirituality and of course Warrior! Send me feedback or feel free to subscribe! 🥰👍👏🏻

To Find Yourself 💙🧠

“For a man to truly find himself, he has to go one place that we’re all entitled to go to. Deep, deep, deep in the mind…”

All you Ultimate Warrior fans probably know that speech he gave on RAW back in 1996. I won’t share the exact date because well, you can look that up on your own and you’ll know why. Jerry Lawler had commented that he was a “lunatic” for talking that way before Goldust came out but again, I get it. It does take quite a while for anyone to truly find themselves because we either are afraid of spending time alone or being judged. Being judged would be mine only years ago and not be people you’d probably think.

Back when I watched good ‘ol WWF, the Sunday morning show of Wrestling Challenge became an emotional ultimate challenge for me. That day we went to church so Superstars on Saturday was a no-brainer depending on which T.V. in the house I chose to watch. While in high school, my Dad decided switching churches to another which was a further drive. The service began at 9:30 and wrestling came on at 11:00. We ALWAYS made it back but guess what I’d be thinking about during the service? Yep, of course. If I knew the Ultimate Warrior was going to be on, I’d get so nervous and antsy. I always felt like lightning ⚡️ would strike me down for not paying attention! 😳

After my brother joined the Navy in Sept. of 1991, I lost a part of myself or so it seemed. Watching wrestling pretty much alone wasn’t the same anymore and I missed our funny banter. So grateful to reminisce with him now… My family knew I still watched but for some reason, I became a “closet watcher.” I’d sneak to watch on any T.V. I could access but change the channel when someone came in the room. That reminds me of Warrior’s story from the book “A Life Lived Forever.” He remembered his step-dad doing the same thing after “Jim” came home from being out with friends. If you can recall, I never shared much about wrestling with my friends but to hide it from my own family who knew I watched seems odd, doesn’t it? 🤔Why was I afraid? Probably because I lost a guy to watch with and was so conditioned to believe it wasn’t for girls. I had to find myself again.

I remember a few times after church when my Mom would be making breakfast. For some reason, Dad didn’t want the T.V. on in the kitchen anymore so I might miss the whole show. I actually would make up excuses to not come down so I could watch WWF upstairs in my brother’s room. Let’s see– a stomachache, I’m in the bathroom, ( for an hour?!) too tired and need to lie down, or anything else. Sometimes SNME was on the night before or I’d be babysitting late so being tired would be a legit excuse! I’d eat later around noon. Did Mom or the others ever figure it out? I don’t know. Maybe I just didn’t ever feel comfortable without my brother but I gotta say– never did I miss it despite my excuses. Think I still watched despite U.W. being gone briefly in ’91. Cable ended my run a year or so later but Warrior had moved on and I did too.

Have you ever felt like you lost a part of yourself and needed to find it again? No, I never watched that much after late 1992 but what are your moments where parts needed to come back? You can go deep in your mind or explore other activities like Warrior but be the one to decide if what you lost is worth finding again. I never thought Warrior would re-surface in my life ever. It wasn’t until I bought a magazine in ’93, (Warrior was making the movie Firepower then) and a few years later finding an Action Figure which brought him back to me in a way. Both of those are great stories! Warrior also never thought after all the years of fueding with Vince that he’d ever be found again. Funny how fate has a way of lining things up that we couldn’t imagine ourselves. This is such a testament to my spiritual journey now.

I do know that never would I have looked up Warrior on my own had it not been for some things which became public. Finding myself didn’t mean watching wrestling anymore or even knowing what Warrior was up to. It meant not being afraid of judgments or ridicule for doing something I liked- whatever that could be. I had to learn to have more confidence in myself which took a long time, even into adulthood. Part of this was my own fear. It was me being fearful of all the emotion that would come as a result of not only following anything Warrior was putting out there but admitting it was o.k.

Whatever is preventing you from finding yourself however that looks, don’t be afraid. It’s your true essence calling out and saying: “I know you’re scared but do it anyway!” Once you finally go deep in your mind, heart, AND soul is when the truth will be found. Warrior had to spend lots of time exploring who he really was as a man but stayed true to himself. Sometimes, parts of us get lost, confused, or mixed up but we eventually get led back by fate or the Universe. To find yourself takes hard work but when you do, it’ll never be lost again. Be the warrior who goes deep as we are entitled to go to. Find yourself for your true nature knows the way.

www.spiritandbelief.com

~~~ Follow me here for book info on how Warrior’s energy inspired my spiritual gifts to open more. I share personal stories filled with humor, family stuff, and some psychic terms but all good! You can find it on Amazon and other outlets. I also write a more spiritual blog so head on over if interested!

~~~ I am also on Twitter and YouTube plus a few U.W. Fb groups (: Find yourself and always believe! 🙏🏻❣️

Moments and Memories

This post will conclude my experiences and emotions regarding five years ago with Warrior’s passing. I’m not sharing my whole day of shock upon hearing the news on April 9, but wanted to relate my grief and the tribute on RAW April 14.

When my brother informed me of the tribute, I had no idea of what to expect. I just knew for those brief minutes that WWE would be on my T.V. that night. The whole day my stomach was in knots as time passed way too fast. I became more immersed in my activities while trying to avoid distractions. So many scenarios played out in my head as I anticipated that volcano inside my throat. 🌋

I had to tell my husband why I wanted to watch RAW which we don’t. So needed to form my words correctly without tears. Prior to this, it was our family game night that the kids initiated a few weeks before. They picked Clue Jr. and Mama calmed her heart to play. Sometimes these games take too long and had to mention possibly cutting it short. There was something on T.V. their Mama needed to watch. Luckily, it ended with about 20 minutes before 8:00–RAW time.

I explained to my husband how my favorite wrestler passed away recently and they were giving him a tribute on RAW. No big deal to him really. Why did I care so much? After all, it wasn’t just his T.V., right? The eerie part for me was where I sat to watch. Really wasn’t even thinking but ended up in the exact same spot I sat a week ago. A week ago when Warrior was still alive making his last television appearance on RAW. That didn’t faze me until later. Very different feelings just 7 days ago.

While watching after several minutes, my husband saw part of the Ultimate Warrior‘s IC title win over Honky Tonk Man. He looked at the T.V. pointed to HTM, and asked:“Is that him?” He meant Warrior. Since I never liked the bad guys as previously blogged, my face grimaced some while slowly saying:“Noo, he’s the other guy…” Not wanting to cry, a little smile formed on my face. Let’s just say emotion-wise that his comment about HTM was better than if we’d seen Undertaker!!! So very glad to see the Honky Tonk Man get inducted this year.

Guess the humor was needed for just a moment. My husband was completely clueless about all this and I wasn’t ready to share. I was actually better than I thought during the tribute but music gets me every time. Every single time. The song “One More Time” by

7 Lions was perfect with the part played. It seemed so wrong to hear the Ultimate Warrior’s theme music without seeing him running or just physically there. I applaud Triple H for getting the crowd going as hearing that music, well, you just can’t sit still. I do have a post about “Unstable” coming soon so stay tuned… Of course the next day, I watched it all again by myself tissues in hand. 💔😢

After the memorial tribute was over, I knew that volcano needed to erupt. I tapped my foot constantly while digging my nails into the side of the couch. I told my husband he could change the channel as I left the room.

Going upstairs to be alone seemed too obvious so I made my way into our half bathroom off the kitchen. After a few moments of silenced sobs, I turned on the faucet full blast to mask my tears. My ugly cries came yet again. That early April made me lose my voice from grief but I blamed it on the exceptionally warm spring which brought about my “cold.”

I’m sharing my story not out of extreme sad memories or my horrible emotional state back then at all. It is being written to show how grief knows no barriers whatsoever. We all grieve, even over losing things. It isn’t just people. I’ve even grieved over getting our new van a few years ago after having our first one 11 years. This year, it’s a new pool that’s replacing our old one and yes, I’ll grieve again. Am sure Dana grieved when selling Casa de Warrior a few years back.

Your grief is yours alone and it knows no time. You will know what journey is truly yours and there is no comparison. Some can say I was crazy to grieve so long and hard for a celebrity. Believe me, I questioned it also. Grief never fully goes away but just changes over time. I debunk many myths we buy into in my book Spirit and Belief.

I kept so much hidden for various reasons and very glad not to hide anymore. Slay those naysayers warriors! Don’t ever feel like your grief doesn’t matter because it does!! Perhaps Dana seemed so strong to all of us but she has such a huge support system which I never had.

Remember that we all need to be validated and go thru a process to get where we are today. We all go in different directions but need support along the way. I validate your grief for whatever reasons and truly understand. We need to let it out and not push it down. Without my process, I wouldn’t be doing all I am now in memory of Warrior. He gave me that validation and supported me from the start.

So, I am moving on from these moments and memories as I continue making new ones. Please do that too. My humor will be back very soon as it is the backbone of many posts! I realize sharing your grief or stories can be so challenging but know you are not alone. Grief makes us stronger.

Just don’t wallow too much as the spirit needs to laugh as well. Make that grief your OWN and let it pass as it needs to. A Warrior is strong but also tender. Celebrate how your sadness makes you real because it matters. A relative, celebrity, an object or memory, we have them all. Some we lose but some we keep. Make sure you keep what’s important as it reflects your life. The ones you keep are imprinted in your soul. Never let anyone deny that of you.

I will never forget April 14 as another moment and memory for me but know it let to a higher purpose. My story makes a difference just like yours does for you. Never by defined by myths, they are meant to be debunked. Grief will lead to joy. Go with it and your strong warrior self will make it truly ultimate. Being “sensitive,” “emotional,” or “too dramatic” isn’t a curse. It’s a blessing and what a life lesson it has been for me. 💙💪🏻🙏🏻~~~ Kathy

www.spiritandbelief.com